After a conversation with a acquaintance-soon-to-be-friend after posting “Gospel-centered Community, Such as It Is”, I have a little better understanding of what the true definition of “Gospel-centered community”: where two or more Christians can walk together in total transparency with each other, iron sharpening iron.

With this new definition in mind, I have revised the following:

I was with some friends the other day and we were discussing the perceived lack of gospel-centered community within our home group outside of our weekly meeting. After about an hour of discussion, we arrived repeatedly at the same conclusion: we all desire to have Gospel-centered community with each other but yet, many of our lifestyles make it difficult to make the time to walk together in that, once we have ALL mutually shared our deepest sin struggles and temptations (we are a multi-generational home group).

To begin: I have SERIOUS trust issues which stem originally from a 12 year nightmarish journey within a religious sect. While there, we also were encouraged to have authentic, transparent “discipling”* times as a body of believers. Unfortunately, that “discipling” was performed in the most abusive form of manipulative work salvation imaginable. Needless to say, while hearing repeatedly how “safe” an environment that home groups possess, I have a knee-jerk trust issue when it comes to transparency, especially in a group setting (I have found that one-on-one conversations are easier to manage).

Here’s my take on the desire to spend time in Gospel-centered community outside of our weekly meeting: I am 47, single (never married), male, and work a non-exempt 40-hour, 7:30-4:30 Monday through Friday work week. As I grew up, I saw that many if not most dating couples had little if any time for “community” with others who weren’t in the same station of life as they. And once they got married, time for others decreased further. Unfortunately, I interpreted that to mean that dating and married couples only had time for their partner or spouse and that just didn’t seem “fair” to me, so I decided that dating and marriage wasn’t for me.

NOW, today, I see the same time restriction. I see couples (dating and married) struggle with the desire to commune with others yet having difficulty making it a reality. Yes, making time for Gospel-centered community is mutually intentional, but … here’s what I have learned and have had to accept: I can either get and remain upset at my friends who are dating or married because they don’t can’t make time for community** OR I can be happy and satisfied with the community I have with those I have it with OR I can become bitter and frustrated. I have chosen the former. It has amazed me how GOD has orchestrated the few friends that I have who have been able to make time for community. Look, the reality is: dating and married couples need to make time for their partners and spouse, and when those marriages produce families, those families need time-investments as well. I don’t believe that they can be held at fault for not feeling able to have the community which they desperately desire. Here’s what I know: I have to be happy and satisfied with what community God has provided me.

*Note: “Discipling” is a term used by the International Churches of Christ, which is today also using the name International Christian Churches.

**Note: I got tired of typing out “Gospel-centered”, so from here on, when I write “community”, it is meant strictly as Gospel-cented community!

[First, let me thank Chris Chavez for his insight into this weekend’s men’s conference (Note: NONE of the contents of this blog are his thoughts or opinions!). Also, read the DISCLAIMER to the RIGHT of this blog before continuing to read!]

I have been asked on a few occasions since this weekend’s 2011 Men’s Conference, “So, have you enjoyed the Men’s Conference?” Well, instead of repeating the same answer, I’ve decided to write it out. And, understand, some of it may be tongue-in-cheek and, well, most of it will probably get me in “trouble” (like THAT hasn’t happened before!). So, buckle up and BRACE FOR IMPACT!

Let me first say this: I love this guy*! I first heard him speak at last year’s men’s conference (the first I had ever attended of the church’s!). He is a gifted speaker and, sadly, I have not read EVERY thing he’s written in his blog (yeah, I’m starting this week so that I can gain a contextual understanding of what he said this past weekend!), and I agreed with the end-result of what he was saying. I guess I just had difficulty with the incredulous things he was quoting Mark Sayers as saying about what has observed of our society’s consumerism**.

I THINK I understood what the main speaker was saying this entire weekend.

The weekend began with the passage of Genesis 1.26-30A (ESV) and the statement that “culture is defining manhood through our media’s advertising campaign”. Several examples were humorously given: beer commercials, the Chevy truck with the “man-step”, Old Spice deodorant, the Dos Equis man, and ArtOfManliness.com Website. Now, he didn’t say anything negatively against the products themselves or the contents of the Website, but related how in their “image creation”, they miss the essence of manhood and that masculinity has now become an accessory. FORTUNATELY, later, he gave two ways how we as Christians can exhibit creation in the image of God!

I found myself being more distracted with questions during this conference than I have during ANY conference or meeting in over 30 years! Questions such as:
*WHAT is the end purpose/importance of defining (or re-defining) masculinity? HAVEN’T we as Christians who regularly attend The Village ALREADY learned how to define masculinity with the help of Matt Chandler’s 6-part Bible study series, “The Image and Glory of God” in August, 2008 (btw, Everything I Learned about Biblical Masculinity, I learned from Matt Chandler!)?
*Just WHO is questioning our masculinity?
*Who CARES what others’ opinions are of our masculinity?
*Are we as Christian men REALLY LISTENING to culture SO CLOSELY that we’re questioning our own masculinity within the Body of Christ and those questions being based on ADVERTISING? Have we stooped so low to STUPIDITY?
*Does everyone chase after how they want to appear to others? REALLY?!
*Are people who move to N.Y. THAT STUPID to “put stock” in believing in the “reality” of television shows like “Friends” and “The Cosby Show”?

Now, I don’t work for or in the advertising industry, but, in the 46 years of my life, I have learned a few things:
*Advertising is used to sell a product but shouldn’t be taken seriously
*Most if not all photography (televised or printed) are Photoshopped (Duh, those burgers NEVER look as good in real life!)
*The television shows we watch are FICTION and just that: actors portraying what is scripted.

In my conversation with Chavez (and an earlier conversation with my home group leader), both stated that, whether I admitted it or not, I was affected by culture and advertising. While I don’t believe that I am COMPLETELY, 100% shielded from culture and advertising, I have taken several steps that I believe might have contributed to my incredulous surprise to this weekend’s messages:

*While I don’t necessarily drive with “blinders”, at 4:45 am, I am conscious enough to pay attention to other drivers, street markings, street signs, and traffic lights. I rarely, if ever, look further up than the level of the aforementioned to see billboard and outdoor advertising (remember: it’s ALL Photoshop and usually advertises CRAP I don’t use or care about!).
*I use Facebook for social networking with my fellow Villagers, Bible college alumni and community-at-large (NOT “image self-identity”!) (which, thanks to limiting the amount of information I display on my Profile and the fact that I rarely if EVER look to the right!), instead of roaming all over the Internet and, remember: it’s ALL Photoshop and usually advertises CRAP I don’t use or care about!
*My email provider is GMail which is FREE and DOESN’T have advertising (like Yahoo!)!
*I rarely enter malls or shop (okay, except for Goodwill, Barnes and Noble, or Half-Price Bookstore) and do a majority of my consumerable items (home, health) through my Quixtar/Amway North America independent business Website, clothing from LLBean.com or LandsEnd.com and book purchases through Amazon.com or the local Barnes and Noble or Half-Price Bookstore. NONE of these companies use the “advertising campaign” methods mentioned above!

So, to answer the initial question, “Did I enjoy the 2011 Men’s Conference?”, I have to first say, “I wouldn’t necessarily use the word ‘enjoy’ “. Let’s just say that I found it both very incredulous and enlightening in regards to what others apparently believe our men are questioning in their masculinity!

For Matt’s series, “In the Image and Glory of God”, go to http://thevillagechurch.net, then click the tab “Resource Library”, scroll down and click “Studies & Seminars”, then scroll down to the messages entitled “The Image and Glory of God”. GREAT series!

*Note: If you attended the Men’s Conference, then you know who the main speaker was. I have chosen not to use his name, as I do not wish to incriminate him for the things I’ve heard him say of his fellow New Yorkers and my interpretation of them.

**Consumerism in the context of this blog posting is defined thirdly by www.thefreedictionary.com as “attachment to materialistic values or possessions”. Do NOT confuse this with the economic definition as “the principles and practices associated with the utilization of economic goods”.

First, the definiton of a “cult” is lengthy in dictionary.com , as follows:

“1. a particular system of religious worship, esp. with reference to its rites and ceremonies. 2.an instance of great veneration of a person, ideal, or thing, esp. as manifested by a body of admirers: the physical fitness cult. 3. the object of such devotion. 4. a group or sect bound together by veneration of the same thing, person, ideal, etc. 5. Sociology . a group having a sacred ideology and a set of rites centering around their sacred symbols. 6. a religion or sect considered to be false, unorthodox, or extremist, with members often living outside of conventional society under the direction of a charismatic leader. 7. the members of such a religion or sect.”

While not being an expert of cults (although I did take a course in Bible college), I had been a member of a religious sect for twelve years and believe that I can write with some authority on the subject from that perspective.

I have been attendance of The Village Church since April, 2004, shortly after Matt Chandler began his leadership, and subsequently, became a covenant member 1-2 years later. During that time period, I have found NO biblical evidence which would lead one to think it a cult or sect. While many of her teachings may seem strict, they are aligned with the Truth of the Bible and can not be argued otherwise. Matt, under the leadership of the Elders, has consistently pointed and led others to the sovereignty of Christ and NOT to himself, unlike most cults and sects.

It is my determination that, under the definition, The Village Church does not possess the attributes or qualify to be a religious sect or cult.

(I’ve posted this both here and at http://www.facebook.com/jkirton2)

 When the iPhone 4 was first announced at the WWDC (“Just what-the-heck does ‘WWDC’ stand for?” “Apple® WorldWide Developers Conference” “Thanks, Google!” (silence) ) on June 7, 2010, I thought, “Meh, I REALLY don’t need a new phone. Besides, this is exactly what Matt (Chandler) (Lead/Teaching Pastor at The Village Church, Highland Village, TX) says all the time about how we as Western civilization are constantly pursuing the latest and newest technological gadgets, never satisfied with what we have!” Besides, really, I probably wasn’t eligible yet under my AT&T™ contract and then, there was the issue of how to get rid of my iPhone 3G (like, who’s gonna want THAT relic, right?!), then switching everything over to the new phone (I mean, how MANY times have we all seen status updates on Facebook of people losing their contact information and begging others to reply with theirs?!) and blah blah blah. It just sounded like a big time-vacuum!

Then someone told me that I MIGHT be eligible, then I read of the new OS 4.0 software update and thought, “Now, THAT’S what I can live with!”

Over the weekend, I went to visit my parents and discussed with my mother the possibility of her taking over my iPhone 3G. At first, she was a little resistant but after a few minutes of playing with mine, she made the comment that she might not be able to live without it! As I was about to leave on Sunday afternoon, she made a point of asking when I would know my decision on purchasing the iPhone 4! WOW! Who’d’a thunk?!

Yesterday (Tuesday, June 15), I heard of some issues Apple® and AT&T™ were having with the pre-ordering of the iPhone 4 and I thought, “Now I’m DEFINITELY not interested in getting in the middle of that mess!” I called AT&T™ last night and confirmed my eligibility. THEN, this morning, while learning that the pre-ordering issue is somewhat resolved, if I was interested in purchasing the iPhone 4, then I needed to decide if I wanted it shipped to me or goto the nearest Apple® store and wait in line for it! Decisions, decisions, DECISIONS!

Well, as of a few hours ago, I learned that Apple® has SOLD OUT of the iPhone 4 with the initial pre-order, with the possibility that more will be available two weeks later. And, you know, that’s OKAY!

For now, I am happy and content with my current iPhone 3G, my contract doesn’t end until 10/2010, an OS 4.0 software update is around the corner, and I’m considering pre-ordering (maybe) this weekend IN PERSON at my nearby Apple® store and having it shipped (I mean, REALLY, stand in line? I don’t think so!) And then, there’s always the consideration that my next iPhone will be iPhone 10!